Today when at Park Meadows for Pokemon Go our first step was the bathroom. A lady with a daughter that appeared to be around 7-8 years old cut everyone in line. The line included both elderly and disabled people. When I called out the woman for her actions she said that her kid really had to go and that it wasn't cutting. No one else called her out for it. I understand that people now a days are afraid of calling people out due to the increase of violence, but as my readers know I have received threats of violence and death threats for my activist work, so I stand up for people being stepped on. This woman thought that she was privileged and didn't have to follow the basic courtesies of our society. This has been on the rise since COVID where people know how to treat others, but just don't do it any more. I told her straight out that she was teaching her child discrimination, ageism, and self-centeredness. She then called me a bitch and said that I should never have children. This was coming from a woman that had no idea of how to act in public or how to treat people.
The problem is that parents are teaching their kids that this behavior is ok when it isn't and by people not stepping up nothing will change except to get worse. Also this situation showed several other issues with this woman's parenting. First off a child of that age should be potty trained or in dippers if not (and a kid that old should not be in dippers). Kids should be potty trained by age four. Most kindergartens won't let kids start with them if they are not potty trained by age 5. Not having a kid potty trained by that age is a form of neglect if not open child abuse. This is a point where child services should step in just for this neglect if not for the mothers other actions. Parents lead by an example and parents that act like this and teach their kids to discriminate should have interventions to stop their actions.
Another thing that played into this interaction was classism. The woman was dressed up and most of the people in the line including myself were dressed down. I was just wearing cotton shorts and a T-shirt. Dressing like this plays into my disabilities. With my MS I have to dress cool in the summer and different fabrics, like high end fabrics, cause nerve pain rubbing on my skin. In our society we judge people by what they wear and not the reasons they may have for dressing the way they do. It gives people the idea that they are better then others and do not have to follow the rules due to their financial standing.
Also as a side note I do not have a gallbladder. Not having this can cause me to have minutes to seconds to get to a bathroom. I understand having to really go, but at the same time even knowing the worst case that can happen, I would never just cut in a line. This is because I understand that many people in that line really need to go (may have similar health issues), or else they probably wouldn't be standing their waiting to go. This comes from understanding what basic needs human beings have and caring about their needs as well. It also has to deal with empathy. As a society we have stopped caring about others and only focus on ourselves.
Why did I put this situation on this blog. It shows that parents are largely responsible for influencing how their children act and on what values they have. This woman was teaching her child her biases, discrimination, hate, and judging. People have to be willing to step up in these situations even if they are afraid of people. We need to call out these behaviors if we want to try to improve the future. This may mean reporting these situations to authority figures. Discrimination is wrong, child neglect/abuse is wrong, hate is wrong, classism is wrong. Be the change in the world.
Moving forward I'm going to keep sharing when I run into these types of situations since I see them nearly daily when I go out.
Resources
Schum, Timothy R., Kolb, Thomas M., eta al. "Sequential Acquisition of Toilet-Training Skills: A Descriptive Study of Gender and Age Differences in Normal Children." Pediatrics March 2002; Vol 109, Issue 3. https://publications.aap.org/pediatrics/article-abstract/109/3/e48/79784/Sequential-Acquisition-of-Toilet-Training-Skills-A
National Clearinghouse on Child Abuse and Neglect Information (DHHS). “Department of Children, Youth & Families.” What is Child Abuse and Neglect. Accessed May 16, 2026. https://dcyf.wa.gov/safety/what-is-abuse.
-This one was interesting because it talks about bathroom issues/potty training issues can show that a child has been abused when they are past the normal age for potty training.
"Emotional Issues and Potty Training Issues." 5/25/22. Adapted from American Academy of Pediatrics Guide to Toilet Training, 2nd Edition (Copyright © 2016 American Academy of Pediatrics). https://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/toddler/toilet-training/Pages/Emotional-Issues-and-Bathroom-Problems.aspx
"Neglect." NSPCC https://www.nspcc.org.uk/keeping-children-safe/types-of-abuse/neglect/
“The Right Age to Potty Train.” HealthyChildren.org, May 24, 2022. https://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/toddler/toilet-training/Pages/The-Right-Age-to-Toilet-Train.aspx?psafe_param=1&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=69654055&gbraid=0AAAAADyMpZH-_dH0NDCLkzYWujGTGj3HD&gclid=CjwKCAjwq6DQBhBVEiwA4ZD5XPB8CDPxIo_0n6n4NDSipIGJ6evsGNNv87jvBW-1otNJX8NHbBZsqxoCEzsQAvD_BwE.
"At What Age Should A Child Be Potty Trained." https://www.pull-ups.com/en-us/resources/tips-advice/when-to-start/potty-training-timeline?gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=19821772748&gbraid=0AAAAAD-kfXzIejA7TRloABoIkRR0zGsuD&gclid=CjwKCAjwq6DQBhBVEiwA4ZD5XD-ub-hOSKyid1eotuvlE0x1zS0BPUoWGxUDDMFThWfjAHulE8r_exoCjTcQAvD_BwE
No comments:
Post a Comment